How do I get vulnerable without getting unsolicited coaching?

Mar 7, 2025 | 106 comments

Questioner: This is me… when I want to be more authentic, it comes out as a perspective on myself where I am not good enough yet. And at the same time, I don’t want coaching on it from my audience. I just want to be real and more of me.

However, me trying to show that makes me want to be truthful and complete and explain everything… (similar to now, where I want to explain to you in a way you understand what’s happening).

Simone: In my experience, whether people offer you unsolicited sympathy, advice, or coaching comes NOT from how much you explain yourself, but how much you are in your power and wholeness when you share about things that might make you feel vulnerable.

You can talk about very tender things, even as they are happening in real time… but there is a way to talk about it that commands respect instead of pity or offers to help. In fact, over-explaining might be a symptom of being somewhere other than in your power!

Because your power isn’t about being, like, RAWRRR! Your power lies in how skillful and sovereign you can be in navigating the darkness, messes, and complexities of life.

(This is what we cover in depth in Truth or Dare, btw.)

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This is part of a Q&A series regarding the Mini Truth or Dare Challenge. Read the rest:

What if I don’t know what my offer is?​

​Can you be fierce without alienating people?​

​How do I get vulnerable without getting unsolicited coaching?​

​Why is my honesty getting crickets?​

​How do I get started writing when in limbo?​

​Is creative expression a “must”?​

​“I’m okay with my clients hating me for a while, but not my audience!”​

​“I don’t want to sell too much, I want to be cool!”​

​Unfiltered truth vs. “pain point marketing”​

​I’ve been silent. Help, give me a dare!​

​I’m being vulnerable… so why am I invisible?​

​Why can’t I just do the damn thing?​

​Why would my target market listen if I’ve failed?

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