I just did an extensive Q&A series on Instagram stories.
On all the topics.
(It is saved as a “stories highlight” on my profile if you want to look. It will be on there for a while, though it might be gone if you’re reading this post far enough in the future.)
Responding to something I said there, a friend asked, “how do I know if my program isn’t just adding to the noise, putting more of ‘what everyone else is doing’ out there?”
I was, and am, so grateful for this question.
It is a courageous question, coming from someone whose spirit is healthy enough to be willing to risk discomfort.
That’s more than I could ask for from… so many.
I thought deeply about how to answer this, and want to talk about it here.
But first, non-duality.
Nothing is inherently noise, or non-noise.
The music you love so much might just be noise to someone else.
The literature you find so meaningful might just be unremarkable strings of words to someone else.
The teaching that saved your life might just sound like fluffy nonsense to someone else.
Noise isn’t an inherent property of anything, but a perception, a judgment.
That said, judgments are sometimes useful.
Judgment is discernment.
And sometimes, the lack of discernment hurts us.
Here’s what I’m willing to define as noise, right now: that which lacks substance and root.
When something is lacking in substance and root and still manages to persist in the world, it is usually because it makes up for what it lacks in other attributes.
Like: the soft manipulation of shiny packaging and sleek slogans, and the ability to appeal to the lowest common denominator through the triggering of our basest instincts.
Add on top of that the irresistible pull of the “cheap, fast, easy, and convenient”, then we have a recipe for something full of static… but no signal.
One of the reasons I’m pulling my old, enormously popular podcast off the air is my profound regret that, in hundreds of episodes teaching people how to get the word out about their thing, I’ve rarely stopped to ask them: “is your thing worth getting the word out about?”
If I were to do a do-over — which I am, now — here’s what I would ask again, and again.
Does your thing have substance?
Meaning, did you come by what you claim honestly?
Is it embodied and battle-tested?
When you take away the packaging, the buzzwords, the constructs and methodologies skimmed off 2-month-long course without the much slower, non-linear, winding and vexatious work of personal cultivation, is there a there there?
And can you answer this infuriating — and yet, ultimately the most important — question of:
“Why does your thing matter in a world where wars and genocides are still raging, a quarter of the global population is living under the poverty line, and where we are all equally facing a mass extinction event, probably less than a century away?”
Does your thing have roots?
Meaning, how deep does it go?
Are the roots deep enough to sustain you through floods, draughts and storms?
What kind of worldsense is it grounded in — if not the default of appropriative, disembodied, post-colonial capitalist emptiness?
Can it stand the test of time?
Where can you track the lineage of your thing?
Is that something you can make moral sense of — if not be proud of?
These are thorny, inconvenient, terribly difficult questions.
If you have an easy and quick time answering them, you’re probably already on the wrong track.
And it’s worth repeating: my biggest regret is that I haven’t posed these questions to the world sooner, more frequently and insistently.
It’s not that I believe everyone should sit on their hands and wait to take action on their passions until they have all the answers perfectly figured out.
I actually think that’s impossible.
But I think the questions beg to be honestly, humbly and vigorously wrestled with.
I think doing so is the work.
It is how you become a person of substance, and how you grow roots.
I don’t think anyone who is unwilling to do so can claim to be a serious person in the public arena.
I think anyone who is unwilling to do so is most likely, by default, just contributing noise.
This is so relevant to me. I work in marketing and support leadership development and coaching organizations. Sometimes I worry that what’s being put out is just noise. Sometimes I’m sure it’s more than noise. It’s an important thing to consider.
I am moved by this conversation. I was trying to put this into words earlier today and failing, and this helps. I want to offer substance not noise. This is an important conversation. Thank you.
I see you Simone.
I am walking on this oh so difficult path, and it feels good to walk it with you.
I have wrestled more than two years now in my writing project, diving into war, violence, abuse, generational trauma as my parents were Vietnamese boat people, and my father survived reeducation camp for 5 years.
And to develop roots also take time, as I get older it’s easier to take a step back and get out of the ‘doing’ and get more in to ‘being’.
Have truer words been spoken? I doubt!
I love this so much!
As I’m venturing into my own business I’m having to consider how and where I want my message to be delivered because it impacts both me whoever is reading. Reading on a blog is a much different experience to reading on Instagram. It’s quiet here and it’s an intentional interaction.
I feel a ‘slow marketing’ wave happening. A reviving somewhat of how we all started off 15 years ago!
Flip… Simone this definitely challenges me. I know I CAN offer something of substance, but so much of the time it’s easy to rely on style. I’ve been getting curious about how I work with dopamine and serotonin, and I wonder about the place of both. Not trying to cop out of providing something with substance, but I wonder about the place of both froth AND bedrock…
Ermagaaaad I needed this so badly. Thank you.
I love this. Being intentional about what we are bringing out to the world to truly create the world we want to live in.
Thank you
Yes. This needs to be heard by more people (unfortunately, it will only be heard by those who need it right now). Social media is so hard for me because everytime I get off I feel energetically drained and sucked dry, I feel like I’m in a pinball machine getting tossed around by everyone who is selling me something or pointing out “a flaw I have” and then offering me a way to fix it – for the low cost of x – blah, blah, blah.
I’ve slowly been starting a business and in a program which I really enjoy, but I feel like the black sheep because marketing or selling that way doesn’t resonate in my heart. Another 30 day program, another fix it solution – does it get results? On the surface ….yes. But how about underneath it all? Not really.
I’m trying to navigate the slow authentic pace of business in a sped up world to genuinely show up, surrender, and be a safe space of healing for those who need it- to address the real roots.
Anyways, I love that you posted this, I love the bravery of you coming clean again and again, I love that you are trying things on and being honest and shedding them in real time in front of our eyes and allowing us to witness the process of what it looks like to continue to go deeper. So appreciated and needed.
Thank you
I grapple with this question daily…am I just adding to the noise? It’s been a powerful question to ask before I post on IG. But not an easy one to answer, because noise is subjective. I appreciate that you note that. Your noise is not my noise. So that makes the question I’m asking inherently difficult for me to answer for everyone. Asking these questions you’ve offered gives me more clarity and direction as I think about sharing/offering: Does it have substance? Does it have roots? Thank you for this.
I love and appreciate this, Simone. The humility it takes! I’ve been on a quest (always, but recently down in the underworld again) and emerged realizing that my deep desire is to be a person of substance. Wonderful to read those words here and remember the roots, too. I’m grateful to be here and witness the shifts in your work and medicine.
Appreciate you turning to slower media, and sharing that with us
Moving to blogs, and away from social media, feels so aligned with my values. Thank you for validating the feelings that have been simmering deep inside me. Your authenticity and generosity are inspiring.