She is a luminous writer. And my teacher on all things antisemitism.
She just collaborated with an illustrator to bring her (previously very off-social media, and enormously influential) writing us a series of essays on building resistance to antisemitism within the context of organizing for Palestine.
I’ve posted a drawing of my own vulva on Instagram for the world to see.
I’ve written about my insecurities, failures and embarrassments in my marketing copy.
I have been called the Queen of Authenticity… but here’s what you might not have assumed: I am actually a fiercely private person.
What I show you are very carefully-selected pieces.
I have never shared about the biggest traumas of my life, and probably never will.
These are the kinds of things that will probably be tender inside me until the day I die… and are NOT for public consumption.
I do not share deeply about my marriage.
I talk about how wonderful my husband is, but the intimate reality of my relationship is way too precious for me to blab about to the world.
I don’t talk much about my Christian faith.
It’s something that is at the very heart of who I am, and I do not want to invite the projections, misunderstandings, questions and debates of the world onto the thing that is the most sacred to me.
I have very few “real life” close friends. With them, I share a history, intimacies, and a sense of humor that you will never see me air online.
Yes, what I show you is curated. But this isn’t me engineering a certain ‘image’ to manipulate your perception of me.
This is about respect.
I show MYSELF respect when I protect what is most tender, intimate, and precious inside me from the public.
And I show YOU respect when I do not put a responsibility on you that you have never consented to take on: that of safeguarding, honoring, and loving on my tenderest places in the very specific way that I require.
And yet, I am truthful with you.
I constantly challenge myself to be even more truthful with you in ways that are congruent with my values… and appropriate to the relationship we have.
Truthfulness does not equal dumping all of my shit on you to deal with.
Authenticity does not equal showing you all of my bleeding wounds so that you can feel like you now have to take care of me.
My friend, I love you. I would love to grow closer with you.
And we can only have a healthy relationship when we have boundaries that allow us to enjoy each other in ways that are safe for both of us…
… and incrementally move into greater degrees of intimacy with fully-informed, mutual consent at every step.
Want to build relationships like this in your business through your copywriting?
I will teach you how.
It’s all happening inside my new course, Writing with the Sword, which kicks off tomorrow.
Tomorrow, I’m dropping the very first transmission, which will…
obliterate the “I don’t know what to write about” syndrome for good
solve the “I don’t know who I’m supposed to write to” dilemma entirely, for all time, and for everyone (yes, that includes if you don’t know what your business is or what your offer is or if you are mid-transition)
bring the difference between extractive copywriting and humane copywriting into brutally clear light, and show you exactly how to opt out of the former
get you starting to write — in the company and support of hundreds of like-minded friends — in ways that immediately start to pull in the best allies for your business.
Want to learn copy from me, but you’re feeling energetically or financially overstretched? No worries. Your timing is the best timing, urgency is a lie, and there is no such thing as missing out.
Please know that the course is always going to be available for you to buy later as a self-study version.
And my game-changing masterclass that fired shots heard ’round the internets, which only costs $25: How to write specific copy
Enjoy. Go slow. Trust yourself. Trust your timing.
Extractive capitalist business coaching culture has taught us that business is a vending machine.
Like this:
We add the ‘right’ input (i.e. the right strategies and ‘clear’ messaging and whatever), we’re supposed to get money output.
It has also taught us to see PEOPLE as vending machines.
Neither your business, nor your people are a vending machine.
Don’t get me wrong. This isn’t a morality lesson.
If this whole “treat people like a vending machine” strategy actually worked to get people real money when they need it, believe me, you’d see me teaching it.
I’d be the first to get it to you.
(Caveat: it actually does work. for the few who are deeply committed to being completely fucking shitty. They keep it up year after year and their conscience doesn’t get in the way, and work on their shitty tans on their stupid yachts bought with scammed money. The result is the post-apocalyptic landscape of dysfunctional relationships, dysregulated nervous systems and emptied bank accounts we’re seeing littering the online business-sphere.)
Here’s what I know, in terms of cold hard business pragmatics.
Approaching people like they’re a vending machine (“how do I write this CTA so they’ll buy?”)…. doesn’t work.
And worse: it repels people who might otherwise have been interested in your thing.
Clear, succinct “I help” statements, in the absence of a genuine community of human relationships that’s gathered around your YOU-ness… doesn’t work.
And worse: it makes people tune you out even when they would have otherwise loved to get to know you, because you sound like literally everybody else on social media and they can’t tell you apart.
I’m being way blunt about all of this because there is such a persistent toxic myth that you can either choose between (1) some kind of romantic idea of you just being ~authentic~ and frolicking through a field of daisies, taking it slow, ‘trusting the universe’…
… or (2) doing it the ‘strategic’ way that is ‘pragmatic’ and actually makes you money fast.
THIS DUALITY IS A MYTH.
Writing humane AND effective copy is actually what makes you the most money, in the most sustainable way.
And humane AND effective copy is NOT the same thing as just ~being yourself~, posting a bunch of random shit and hoping some of it ‘sticks.’
It is a deeply confronting engagement with the aliveness inside you, and holding yourself to such a high standard of integrity in your relationships so that you genuinely become a safe place for others to spend money.
Here is my wish for you:
You become so skilled in doing that, that people are transformed just by reading your writing, and the world becomes a safer, more beautiful and humane place just because of your writing….
… so much so that it becomes a no-brainer for people to support you with their money.
Because whatever you’re doing… they know they want more of it.
For ALL of our sake.
There is a method to this madness. And it is many galaxies away from extractive capitalist copywriting.
I will teach it to you. ALL of it. The inner work, and the skill-building.
And we will journey through 7 weeks together, with tons of support from me, to make sure it becomes embodied.
Because nothing else will do.
My unconventional copy course “Writing with the Sword,” an unapologetic “fuck you” to everyone who’s ever told you to squeeze yourself into an “I help” statement, begins Wednesday.
Here’s the uncomfortable truth. No matter how earnestly they say things like “I’d love to take you up on it one of these days”…
… you won’t see a single dollar unless they can see how your thing does one of the following two things (prepare to take notes!):
(1) Your thing takes away a specific pain that is URGENT for them, and they know of no other way to get rid of the pain despite having tried and tried and tried, and they’re feeling a visceral “ughhhhhhh!!!” about it.
or….
(2) Your thing gives them something specific they URGENTLY want, and they know of no other way to get the thing despite having tried and tried and tried, and they’re feeling a visceral “ughhhhhhh!!!” about it.
Miss these two things? You can have the world’s most brilliant, original, and earth-shakingly powerful offer, and be passed up for someone who knows 10% of what you do. Ouch.
Time for a reality check. Most folks hear “heal your trauma with somatic work,” and have no visceral reaction.
Rita does, however, have a visceral “ughhhh” to finding herself repeating the same verbal abuse that she got from her mom, to her own kid. It makes her horrified to notice. She’s tried so hard to change it on her own, but when she’s stressed and tired… she snaps, and there it happens all over again.
Most people hear “rewire your brain to change your habits,” and have no visceral reaction.
Benny does, however, does have a visceral “ughhhh” to the fact that he’s spent THOUSANDS of dollars on gym memberships without ever going.
Every morning, he says “today!” but when he gets off work, he’d rather reach for a beer and say, “eh, tomorrow.” And then he feels relaxed for a second… and hates himself afterward.
The longer it goes on, the more ashamed he feels, and the more ashamed he feels, the less he wants to go. A vicious cycle he’s fucking sick and tired of. Meanwhile, his confidence is in the basement, affecting his work and love life.
You can just feel the visceral “ughhh!!”, right?
But most people don’t write copy like this.
Instead, they go on and on about how powerful somatic work is, the modalities they’ve been trained in, and how easy it can be to change habits through neuroscience principles…
… meanwhile, people are zoned way out and looking for someone to pay money to so they can get help with their “ughhhh”s.
Unfortunately, most people find it difficult to speak to the “ughhhh”s because they’ve never been taught how to look for them.
They’re also unsure how to talk about it the “ughhhh”s a way that is compassionate and helpful without feeling contrived…
… and doesn’t feel like you’re pushing against their bruises to make a sale. Because, ew, that’s gross.
This is exactly what I am breaking down inside Writing with the Sword.
I will lead you through a simple process to find your people’s most urgent “ughhhh”… and speak to it in a way that is clear, specific, and compassionate.
Then I’ll teach you how to invite them to change that feels both loving AND compelling.
I teach on this, and soooooo much more that will turn copywriting into your money-making power tool for the rest of your life.
P.S. — When I talk about money-making stuff, I gotta say this, because money is such a charged thing that easily triggers scarcity-buying. And we’re NOT about that!
None of this is a quick fix. It takes time, patience, and a spirit of devotion to the craft.
It is SO incredibly worth it. But it is not overnight… and no real skill-building ever is.
I’ll be with you every step of the way, and make it as simple and fun as possible. Ready to roll up your sleeves?
They said they’re super interested in working with you. You replied, “amazing, here are the next steps!”
And….
*** crickets ***
Now what should you do?
Here’s the answer: NOTHING.
Don’t think about them.
You call in whom you focus on.
Every minute you spend problem-solving for someone who’s not ready to make the leap…. is another minute you’re NOT showing up for someone who IS.
Now…
What about that person who said they love your work, and potentially want to hire you… but are shopping around for other options?
What do you do?
Once again: NOTHING.
Stop thinking about them.
You call in whom you focus on.
Every minute you spend trying to figure out people who are shopping around, is another minute you’re NOT spending calling in someone for whom what you do has no competition.
What about those people on your email list who haven’t even opened the last 10 emails you’ve sent them? What should you do about that?
You guessed it: NOTHING.
Stop thinking about them.
You call in whom you focus on.
Every bit of energy you give to people who aren’t reading, you’re NOT giving to the person who is DELIGHTED every time they see your name in their inbox, and can’t open that email fast enough.
All that said, don’t get me wrong.
“Stop thinking about them” doesn’t mean they’re bad people and you hate them.
It doesn’t mean you take a defensive pouty posture like, “well, if you can’t see my worth, then fuck off!!!”
It just means you must be disciplined where you put your mind, because what you spend time thinking about and problem-solving for literally creates your reality.
If you want to call people who ‘get’ it, think your work has no parallel, and are hungry for every word that comes out of your mouth because it feeds them like nothing else does…
… (by the way, know that you GET TO HAVE that)…
… your first job to (1) believe that they exist, (2) deprive all the other random shit taking up space in your brain of oxygen, and (3) create an energetic ecosystem that is exclusively for THEM.
You might be asking, at this point… “Is this enough? What about folks who adore me, say they want to buy, but still haven’t bought?”
Why haven’t they indeed? Great question. There are only two reasons.
(1) There are still gaps of information for them,
(2) and/or they are still working on feeling SAFE enough to take the plunge.
So, how do you strategically fill those gaps of information, and create the safety for them to buy NOW?
And do it with care and consideration for them as human beings?
100% full disclosure, I was a little tipsy when I wrote this.
Enjoy.
< a little fictional dramedy >
Jesus Christ: “I am the Son of God, here to take away the sins of the world.”
Online Business Guru: “Okay, loving the confident mindset, boss babe!!!! But I need more.. who’s your Ideal Customer Avatar?”
Jesus Christ: “All of y’all sinners.”
Online Business Guru: “Okay babe we’re gonna have to be a little more targeted than that! Let’s narrow it down. Who have you served in the past? What do they have in common?”
Jesus Christ: “Well i was just talking to these two dudes, telling them to be the fishers of men….”
Online Business Guru: “Fishers of men… okay, I’m not getting the vibe yet, hun! Tell me more. What kind of car do these ~fishers of men~ drive? What are their pain points? What’s on their vision board? What’s their Starbucks order?”
Jesus Christ: “…. what.”
Online Business Guru: “you need to know all these things to get them to follow you.”
Jesus: “They are literally already following me.”
Online Business Guru: “Okay babe, I’m not seeing the 7-figure mindset here… Are you in it to win it or not???”
Jesus Christ: “I can’t believe i died for your sins”
……. aaaaaand scene.
You’re welcome.
xo,
Simone
P.S. — This could be you.
Writing knockout copy so fast, you could do it tipsy.
There’s a method to doing it fast, without compromising on quality.
When you learn the art of it, you can crank out irresistible posts or emails in minutes…
… so you can go back to remodeling your kitchen or taking care of your dad or doing soju shots with your honey (…. like I did after writing this little thing ).
She’s one of the most brilliant people I know. I feel strongly everyone should know her work.
And guess what?
She told me she only sends emails to her people like once every TWO months.
WHAAT.
I was appalled. (If you had any doubt…. YES, THAT IS WAY TOO FEW!!!!)
And of course, I was yelling at her about it, begging her to PLEASE give the people what they want… which is, more of her.
She was, understandably, a little apprehensive about it. She asked: “But how many emails is too many? Won’t people get sick of them?”
Here’s what I told her.
“There is a huge difference between writing to connectto people, and writing to market AT people. People love connecting. People hate being marketed AT. if you write twice a week genuinely connecting to people, they’ll love reading every word.”
She was a little stunned to hear this.
***
We email to connect, NOT to push our shit at people.
Email is a sacred place where we get to feel the heartbeat of another person, and revel in our stories together.
Our togetherness right here, right now makes the cruelty and madness of life… make a teenybit more sense.
Don’t get me wrong… of course, I run a business, so I let you know about my offers and invite you into them, too.
And I do so without apology, because my shit is GOOD!
But guess what?
I’ve already been writing devotedly for years when I was making NO money.
To this day, I send emails that have nothing to do with me selling anything.
And even if I completely folded my business in the future, I would still continue to write to you.
BECAUSE THIS, TO ME, IS TRULY ABOUT THE HUMAN RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN YOU AND ME.
Almost nobody approaches email marketing this way.
Many would even call my approach dumb.
Maybe I am, but if ‘dumb’ means I get to touch tens of thousands of lives and make millions of dollars using nothing but my words, I’m fine with that.
***
Dear friend, if you hope to touch lots of people with your gifts, you want to have email on your side.
Especially in the age of social media, where Zuck owns all of your shit and can take away all of it whenever they want.
There’s a lot that goes into writing exceptional emails with HEART and SOUL.
I created a fat little resource called “Simone’s Email Secrets“, in which I have distilled not just my unique email philosophy, but also all my best tips and tricks for:
establishing a writing routine that is actually enjoyable and doesn’t take you forever,
writing emails people WANT to read, even if they hate everybody else’s emails,
making sure your email is actually making you good money — without EVER making folks feel hustled and preyed upon.
This is everything you need to know.
And this resource is included as a supplemental lesson inside Writing with the Sword, on top of the primary curriculum.
We start next Wednesday.
P.S. — Speaking of supplemental lessons… this ain’t the only one.
I am including a total of FIVE supremely useful bonus resources inside Writing with the Sword:
Bonus #1: Simone’s Email Secrets
Bonus #2: The Book of Never-Ending Copy Prompts
Bonus #3: The Irresistible CTA Guide
Bonus #4: The Ultimate Book of Copy Q&A: The Expanded Edition
Bonus #5: Fix Your Damn IG Bio: The Cheat Sheet
If you’ve been in any of my courses, you know that every single thing I do is extremely nutrient-dense.
When I say this is the only copywriting training you’ll ever need…
Right before going to bed last night, here’s what I sent my BFF, Julie.
Yes. That’s my kid. The love of my life.
I happen to find it HILARIOUS when he’s wailing at the top of his lungs. (Okay, I’m not a sadist – it’s not like I take pleasure in his pain I only think it’s funny when he is being over the top tragic about something like… not being allowed to eat a whole bag of Haribo gummies before dinner. Oh, toddlers…)
So anyway…. this is actually a copywriting lesson, okay?
Here’s what I want you to notice about this text exchange: that was the whole conversation. Just those two lines.
Took me 3 seconds. There was no context. No lead-in. No point-by-point elaboration of what I mean. None of that is necessary because… hello??? Julie and I are friends. This is how you talk to your friends, too, right?
I didn’t have a ‘reason’ for sending this text… other than knowing it’s gonna probably give her a chuckle.
And now, here’s what I really want you to notice, the million-dollar lesson: this is how we NATURALLY communicate with people we know, like, and trust. No throat-clearing. No giant preamble. No unnecessary explaining. No hidden agenda and tortured call-to-action.
Just:”Hey, I thought you’ll like this.” “OMG look what I saw on my walk!” “I had a thought about that thing you told me the other day.”
We just get right to the heart of things. It’s easy. It’s quick. It’s effortless. It makes us feel connected.The connection is the most important goal. The only goal, most of the time.
My friend, THIS is actually how you write copy that is FAST, LIGHT, and ACTUALLY READABLE.
Why? it’s because our brains interpret this kind of speech as “real human talking!! must pay attention!!”, as opposed to “I am now being marketed to… better tune out!”
Take a moment to really think about this. When I announced that you’ll be writing copy every single day inside Writing with the Sword, I’ve gotten so many replies like, “But what if writing takes me forever?” Look. If I were submitting an article to be published in the New York Times, I would take my good ass time with it. I would edit, edit, edit, and edit that shit 78 times to make sure it represents my best.
But copywriting ain’t that. Copywriting is never that. Your job is NOT to present a clear, coherent, beautifully structured essay on your best thoughts. Leave that to the New York Times writers.
The aim of copy is to create a MOMENT OF CONNECTION. And you can do that in seconds, minutes.When you spend hours and hours on your copy… what you are actually broadcasting is yourdiscomfort, your unfamiliarity, and the lack of trust you have in the relationship with your reader.
And unfortunately, what that creates is clunky, stilted and heavy writing that few people want to read.
Of course, there’s a little bit more to the art of writing fast and still resonating with people.
This is just a tiny snippet of the kind of stuff we’ll cover inside Writing with the Sword. But by the end of the course, “ugh, every post takes hours” will be history.
Whatcha gonna do with all the time you’ll get back? 🙂
You love me because of my chaotic-good, non-linear, ADHD ways, right?
RIGHT?
Okay.
Because I juuust finally wrote up the blurb on exactly what you’re going to learn in the Way of the Sword. hahahaha
(File me under evidence for: “people will buy your stuff even if they have no idea what’s going to happen inside it”…)
And we don’t have a curriculum. Instead, we have … quests!!
Here’s what you’ll be playing with…
Quest 1. The Magic of the “Right Person”
There is a “right person” profile for your business. And it has absolutely NOTHING to do with niches, or the often-taught “ideal customer avatar.” Fuck that shit. I’ll teach you how to identify your “right person,” and make them come out of the woodwork.
Quest 2. The “Addictive Copy” Recipe
Yes, there IS a recipe! I actually reverse-engineered this process by looking back on my most viral posts, and most responded-to emails. Aha — clear pattern emerged, and I myself follow it religiously. Now, it’s yours, too.
Quest 3. Befriending the Darkness
We’re not here for the “Love and Light” stuff. You know that right?
To become a true leader, and not just an ‘influencer’, you must not shy away from dark topics (both personal, and about the larger world) that most people would rather avoid. I’ll teach you how to write about the hard stuff in a way that feels good to you, and is actually useful for people.
Quest 4. The Superpower of Specificity
The epidemic of vague copy needs to stop! I will teach you how to write in a way that is so specific that makes people say “ARE YOU READING MY DIARY??” and makes you stand out from the “Sea of Beige.”
Quest 5. Pro-level Editing
It’s all about the editing, baby!There is a specific sequence I take myself through after I write the first draft to cut the fluff, hook their attention, and keep them reading all the way until the end… and of course, make it irresistible for them to take action. And it takes minutes, not hours. Grab my entire detailed guide for this.
Quest 6. Cash-generating Copy
There are about a handful of extremely simple things you should be doing that will help you to sell a lot more. Emphasis on SIMPLE!!!! I will guide you through the steps, and help you establish a habit of doing them consistently. (None of them will feel gross, I promise.) And then you make more money… for the rest of your life. Simple as that.
(And even though quests 5 + 6 look like they come last, they’re gonna be dropped on the very first day… because, hello? I want you to be editing like a pro and bringing in those ca$hdollaz from day 1.)
Ohhhh yeah, baby.
7 whole weeks of implementing the shit out of all of these. With me as your copy fairy and editor. YES.
We start May 8th!
Damn… that’s next week!
P.S. — ummmm did you grab the INSANE new resource I just dropped?
I just compiled the Ultimate Copywriting Q&A. You can download that biatch right away, for FREE.
Play with this while you wait for the course to begin!
