Simone Seol

Questioner: [Referring to the Mini Truth or Dare challenge] Why going live instead of record a video and publish? Because it allows no retake? And do you plan it ahead and ask your followers to come? 

Ahhhhh I’m still taking “live” so seriously! I guess I’m just so embarrassed no one would show up. Or I’m very annoyed by ppl constantly popping in and out (I’m afraid that way no one gets anything “valuble”) 

(that’s also my biggest resistance to go live, as if ppl should spend a solid chunk of undisturbed time in order to get the best of my stuff. I hated people scrolling and multitasking!)

Omg this challenge exposes so many of my long-have fears! Thanks as always Simone. 

Simone: Most lives I have done in the earlier stage of my business, no one showed up. Maybe one or two people, drifting in and out. Even now when I do lives, people are constantly in and out. Very few people stick around for the whole thing.

The question is: are you going to prioritize how OTHERS show up, or whether YOU show up? What are you going to make important? Because guess what? When you make whether YOU show up more important, everything about your business changes. 🙂

You got this!

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Claim your ticket to the one-and-only live round of Truth or Dare.

Take your “Which one of the 4 types of hiders am I?” quiz, and get your free customized Mini Truth or Dare Challenge.

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This is part of a Q&A series regarding the Mini Truth or Dare Challenge. Read the rest:

What if I don’t know what my offer is?​

​Can you be fierce without alienating people?​

​How do I get vulnerable without getting unsolicited coaching?​

​Why is my honesty getting crickets?​

​How do I get started writing when in limbo?​

​Is creative expression a “must”?​

​“I’m okay with my clients hating me for a while, but not my audience!”​

​“I don’t want to sell too much, I want to be cool!”​

​Unfiltered truth vs. “pain point marketing”​

​I’ve been silent. Help, give me a dare!​

​I’m being vulnerable… so why am I invisible?​

​Why can’t I just do the damn thing?​

​Why would my target market listen if I’ve failed?

Questioner: Hi Simone, how would you approach Truth or Dare when I am trying to help someone with chronic symptoms or help them put into remission… Sometimes giving them the unfiltered truth of what happens when they don’t take action or show up can sound really rude… 

Because I feel it kind of ends up inducing fear rather than empowerment (depending on how it’s perceived), but at the same time I also want to keep in mind that they are humans going through this experience and trying to navigate it. My approach (even with clients) is compassionate, but sometimes I feel it might not be serving them. Thoughts?

Simone: Tell me what the difference is between being compassionate and being nice?

Questioner: Good question. When I say being compassionate, I want them to know that I understand what they are going through – their pain, struggles, symptoms etc.
Being nice is perhaps trying to please them …and not say something for the risk of offending them … because they might not want to hear it.

I think the problem is sometimes the lines between the 2 are blurred in my approach lol That’s a lightbulb moment. I don’t know where to draw the line.

Simone: You know exactly where the line is because compassion and niceness have nothing to do with each other. Compassion is caring, and niceness is trying to control their thoughts about you. Compassion is sometimes not nice, and niceness is not necessarily compassionate.

Questioner: Okay you are calling me out and that makes perfect sense! Fuck! I am indeed trying to control their thoughts about “sounding rude” if I don’t sugar coat something …

Simone: Now, second question. What is the difference between telling them about potentially unpleasant future possibilities from a place of trying to manipulate them into buying your thing, vs trying to magnify their awareness of what they already know so they can take the action they already know they want to take

Questioner: Honestly, I feel most of them “don’t have enough awareness” because they don’t get it from mainstream medicine. At the same time they need to know them ignoring and not working on it is only magnifying the prob. I am afraid that I might “instill” fear in them and create a placebo (especially ones who are silent readers or not clients yet) that they are doomed!

Simone: If I tell my kid, if he keeps eating candy every single day he’s going to get cavities and have to go to the dentist… is that instilling fear in him? Will that create a negative placebo?

Questioner: Well when you put it that way…NO!!!

Simone: Why is that different from the shitty pain point marketing thing?

Questioner: Because you are giving them the truth/reality down the road. But….please offer me a perspective: The kid stops eating candy because “he is afraid of his tooth getting damaged/falling out”, he is doing it because of the fear of consequences…and not from an empowered place so to speak..

Simone: Yeah we SHOULD have a healthy fear of future consequences. People SHOULD quit smoking because they might get cancer. We SHOULD have car insurance in case we have an accident. The difference is this: whether you’re telling people this because you genuinely want the best for them, versus trying to use the fear to push the sale

Questioner: It’s the former…but I am afraid of being perceived as 2. Voila! you took me back to the first conversation…

Simone: The point of alerting those two future consequences of their choices is to empower them to make a fully INFORMED choice.  if someone hears about the dangers of not having car insurance, and they still choose not to get it, that’s their choice. But once they fully connect with the healthy fear, they can buy insurance from me or someone else, but now, they’re not going to be caught off guard if their car gets totaled, and they can’t afford to deal with it. 

And as to people having wrong perceptions about your intentions… welcome to life. That’s life always. People will misunderstand you no matter what. Even if you say absolutely nothing, people are still going to misunderstand you. So the choice is yours. Whether you’re going to act for courage, or act from your fear. Either way, you’re stuck on planet Earth, where other humans exist and they’re going to use their brain filter to think whatever they want.

Questioner: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! Makes sense!!!!!!! The sale in fact is not the problem. I absolutely WANT them to make their choice. But all these questions pop up in terms of marketing and visibility.

If only I can have this drilled down my head … My conscious mind knows…but my unconscious gets sneaky and brings up the fear. This was all so helpful!!!! I so appreciate your brain and wisdom and time.

Simone: This is exactly why I’m offering Truth or Dare. You can know this intellectually or you can actually give yourself the structure and tools to make yourself uncomfortable and take the risks in a strategic way that aligns with your values and expands your capacity for courage.

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Claim your ticket to the one-and-only live round of Truth or Dare.

Take your “Which one of the 4 types of hiders am I?” quiz, and get your free customized Mini Truth or Dare Challenge.

---

This is part of a Q&A series regarding the Mini Truth or Dare Challenge. Read the rest:

What if I don’t know what my offer is?​

​Can you be fierce without alienating people?​

​How do I get vulnerable without getting unsolicited coaching?​

​Why is my honesty getting crickets?​

​How do I get started writing when in limbo?​

​Is creative expression a “must”?​

​“I’m okay with my clients hating me for a while, but not my audience!”​

​“I don’t want to sell too much, I want to be cool!”​

​Unfiltered truth vs. “pain point marketing”​

​I’ve been silent. Help, give me a dare!​

​I’m being vulnerable… so why am I invisible?​

​Why can’t I just do the damn thing?​

​Why would my target market listen if I’ve failed?

Questioner: Hi Simone. This is regarding your Truth & Dare post.

I went through some shift in my journey. I went silent, and it’s been a while since I put out my offer. I’m struggling to put one out as hesitation arises. I think I’m going for your dare challenge. Help!

Simone: What would be your desired goal if you could wave a magic wand and make it happen?

Questioner: Money, sales, aligned clients. WHY IS IT UNCOMFORTABLE TO ADMIT?

Simone: Ok, here’s your first dare: admit that you want money, sales, and aligned clients. Say it out loud. Because you’re good at what you do and can’t wait to make an impact.

Then tell people what you help with, and end with an invitation. No over-explaining, justifying, apologizing, or hedging. Just say it plainly and straightforwardly.

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Claim your ticket to the one-and-only live round of Truth or Dare.

Take your “Which one of the 4 types of hiders am I?” quiz, and get your free customized Mini Truth or Dare Challenge.

---

This is part of a Q&A series regarding the Mini Truth or Dare Challenge. Read the rest:

What if I don’t know what my offer is?​

​Can you be fierce without alienating people?​

​How do I get vulnerable without getting unsolicited coaching?​

​Why is my honesty getting crickets?​

​How do I get started writing when in limbo?​

​Is creative expression a “must”?​

​“I’m okay with my clients hating me for a while, but not my audience!”​

​“I don’t want to sell too much, I want to be cool!”​

​Unfiltered truth vs. “pain point marketing”​

​I’ve been silent. Help, give me a dare!​

​I’m being vulnerable… so why am I invisible?​

​Why can’t I just do the damn thing?​

​Why would my target market listen if I’ve failed?